Tuesday, August 09, 2005

8/9/5

this might be my last post for a while. my life is taking a downward spiral & fast. just goes down. sometimes it seems some of us aren't meant for this world, like our peace is somewhere else.
i fucked up. said something to my son i shouldnt have. my intentions were right but what i said, i can never take back & he'll never look at his mom the same. i meant it to help him understand. now things are just fucked up. i should have thought things out more but i didnt
he was worried cuz i was upset but i assured him i'm okay. i'm not. when the going gets tough, jane runs. but things look gloomy and the 2 people in life i love the most, my kids, won't ever see me the same again. i cant undo that. cant get past it and cant move on. i've ruined them.
this will probably screw up things with tarzan too but i'm thinking of that carole king song, way over younder. that song makes sense.
i'm not doing too good

posted by jane at 1:52 PM